Welcome technophobes, grease monkies, and motorheads

Welcome to a new'ish' site written by and with the imput from people who,s brains are so full of;
Technical abillity, Insane ideas, and the love of wierd and wonderfull shit, that there is no time in their over stressed brains for "CRAP" like spelling and punktuation.

Sunday 11 December 2011

SPORTSTER PROJECT PT1


NO IT'S NOT A BLOODY XR1200

 YESTERDAY THE BRAKES ON MY CAR WORE THEM SELVES OUT SO I HAD TO GET THE BIKE READY FOR WORK TODAY.
AFTER A FULL DAY AT WORK I WAS IN THE SHED TILL 10 LAST NIGHT . I WAS COMPLEETLY FUCKED AND IT WASN'T READY SO I THOUGHT 'FUCK IT ILL PUT SOME MOLE GRIPS ON THE BRAKE LINE (DAVES IDEA) AND FINISH THE BIKE TOMOROW NIGHT,
AT 4.30 THIS MORN' I WAS WIDE AWAKE SO I FOUND MY-SELF IN THE SHED BLEADING BRAKES, WIRING BACK LIGHTS AND MAKING SURE EVERYTHING WAS TIGHT.


 I HAD A FEW ISUES DRIVING TO WORK , BUT NOW ITS SORTED.
 IT HANDLES BETTER THAN I EXPECTED, BUT I FEAR IM GUNNA SPEND THE REST OF MY TIME SAYING"IT'S NOT AN XR1200"
 WHY DIDNT I JUST BUY AN XR1200. BECAUSE A THE TIME I DIDN'T THINK I WANTED ONE AND THERE IS TOO MUCH PLASTIC ON THEM. INSTEAD I HAVE A BIKE THAT IS ME, ALL MINE AND ISNT JUST A SHOP- BOUGHT HARLEY. IT ANIT A SHOW BIKE BECAUSE I USE IT AND IF IT WAS TOO SHINEY I WOULDN'T.

SPORTSTER PT10

 NEARLY ON THE ROAD??
HERE IS A SNEEKY PEEK AT THE WAY THE SPORTSTER IS COMING TOGETHER.

 I WAS TRYING TO GET IT DONE THIS WEEKEND BUT IT IS TAKING A BIT LONGER THAN EXPECTED.
OVER THE PAST FEW DAYS IVE MADE
WHEEL SPACERS.
FITTED TYRES.
MOVED THE TANK MOUNTS (AS IT WAS HITTING THE NEW YOLKS (TREES FOR YOU AMERICANS).
MADE BRACKETS FOR THE EXHAUSTS.
FITTED ALL CONTROLS AND HANDLEBARS.
MADE AND FITTED SPRING MOUNTS FOR THE PIPES.
BUT I JUST REALISED THAT I NEED TO CHANGE THE ANGLE FOR THE END CAN BECAUSE IT IS TO DIFFICULT FOR ME BIRD TO REACH THE REAR FOOTPEG (SHAME BECAUSE IT LOOKS BLOODY COOL)

SPORTSTER PT 9 (I THINK)

 GOT MY NICE SHINEY WHEELS AND SWINGARM BACK FROM 'DOWIE' WHO SPAYED THEM IN RETURN (AND MAYBE SOME MORE PAINTING, I DONT WORK FOR FREE, BUT IM CHEEP, AS ANY EXCUSE FOR MAKING MYSELF BETTER AT SOMETHING IS ALWAYS GRABBED WITH BOTH HANDS) FOR A FRAME HE WANTS BUILDING WHEN I FINISH THE SPORTSTER.
THE TANK AND SIDE PANNELS ARE WHAT I JUST PAINTED ( THE PHOTO REALLY DOSNT DO JUSTICE TO JUST WHAT A SHIT JOB I DONE). BUT DAVE IS GUNNA 'MATT LACQER THEM, THEN THEY WILL LOOK SUPER TOUGH.
 NOW! I WANTED THE WELDS ON MY BIKE TO BE A FEATURE BUT INSTEAD THEY ARE A BIT OF AN EYE-SORE, BUT AT LEAST I'M A BIT BETTER AT 'TIG' WELDING STAINLESS NOW THAN I WAS BEFORE.
NOW ITS TIME FOR A "NEWKEY BROWN" . SHIT I HAVENT DRANK THIS STUFF SINCE I USED TO GET LEG-LESS IN THE LOCAL ROCK CLUB WHEN I WAS 17. APARENTLY IT SENDS YOU MENTAL, WHICH MAY EXPLAIN A FEW THINGS...
 FINALLY I MANAGED TO FINISH PIECING HE EXHAUST TOGETHER.
I TRYED TIG WELDING SECTIONS LAST NIGHT BUT I WAS STRESSED AND IN A RUSH SO ALL I MANAGED WAS TO STICK THE ELECTRODE TO THE WORK OVER AND OVER AGAIN, YOU JUST CANT TIG WHEN YOURE IN A RUSH SO I LEFT IT AND TRYED AGAIN TODAY. ITS AMAZING HOW IT WORKS WHEN YOU ARE CALM.PROVING THAT IT'S TRULY THE "KUNG FOO" OF WELDING TECHNICS. (KUNG FOO MEANS "HARD WORK")

ITS A LITTLE DIFFICAULT TO SEE ON THE PHOTO BUT I MANAGED TO CUT AND WELD TWO SECTIONS AT A SLIGHT ANGLE. AND WELD A CUT SECTION INBETWEEN. THANKYOU RICHIE FOR THE INSPIRATION (I DONT GIVE YOU ENOUGH CREDIT FOR YOUR WISE ADVISE)
 I THEN SQAUSHED ONE END OF THE, BIG 'INTERMEDIATE' ,SECTION INTO AN OVAL AND WELDED IT TO THE SECTIONS THAT I HAD SPLICED TOGETHER. THEN WELDED THE WHOLE KABOODLE ONTO TWO SECTIONS THAT SLIP OVER THE PIPES. (SIMPLES)
THE PIPES JUST NEED WELDING COMPLEETLY . THE END CAN WILL BE CUT DOWN HALF THE LENGTH, CLEANED AND SPRAYED BLACK. IT SHOULD SOUND LIKE

 "EVIL" IN A CAVE .....


SPORTSTER PT6

 CARRIED ON MAKING THE EXHAUST TODAY. I FIND IT TOTALLY SATISFYING CUTTING AND WELDING EXHAUST SECTIONS.
 YOU CAN JUST SEE ' JACK THE BASTARD' LINGERING IN THE BACKGROUND, WAITING FOR A BIT OF ARC-EYE..

THIS IS THE FRONT SECTION TACKED AND LOOKING GOOD. BUT JUST TRYED FABRICATING THE 2-1 LINK AND GOT COMPLEETLY FRUSTRATED, SO ILL HAVE ANOTHER GO TOMOROW.


SPORTSTER PROJECT

 IVE JUST MOVED INTO 'STEPFORD' . MY HOUSE AND GARAGE IS SUROUNDED BY SO MANY HOUSES THAT I HAVE TO BE REAL CAREFUL HOW MUCH NOISE I MAKE. (I FEAR THAT IF I USE MY ANGLE GRINDER THEIR WILL A MOB OF LOCALS WITH PITCH FORKS READY TO BURN ME). SO FIRST THING I DID THIS MORNING WAS TO DRY FIT THE FORKS
 THEN I GOT INTO MAKING MY STAINLESS EXHAUST. I USED A HACKSAW TO CUT THE SECTIONS (DUE TO QUITNESS) BY HAPPILY I THINK IT WAS MUCH EASIER TO CUT A STRAIT LINE WITH THE HACKSAW INSTEAD OF AN ANGLE GRINDER. ILL USE THE HACKSAW FROM NOW ON .
 I BOUGHT A SELECTION OF BENDS AND CUT AND TACKED THEM TOGETHER.
LOOKING COOL SO FAR I RECKON.
I NEED A SMALL PART BEFOR I CAN FABRICATE THE FRONT PIPE.
 SO I MADE A LIGHT AND NUMBERPLATE BRACKET USING THE LIGHT FROM MY OLD RAT FZ750.
 GOOD AFTERNOONS WORK, I FEEL CHUFFED SO NOW IM HAVIN A CELIBRATION PINT

SPORTSTER PT6

 LAST NIGHT I FINISHED MAKING THE DISC AND SPROCKET CARRIER .
 WHADUYA KNOW IT ACTUALLY FITTED, BUT THEN I REALLISED THAT I HAD DRILLED THE HOLES TOO BIG FOR THE DISC AND WHEN I REMEASURED I REALISED THAT IT WAS ALSO 5MM TOO THIN. SO I'VE ASKED THE ENGINEER TO MAKE ME ANOTHER SO THAT I CAN TRY AGAIN.

THE ENGINEER ALSO MADE ME SOME BITS SO THAT I COULD BLOCK THE HOLES ON MY TOP YOLK (FOR THE FZR1000) SO THAT I COULD RE-DRILL IT FOR MY HANDLE-BAR CLAMPS.
 NICE ARNT THEY
 HAMMERED IN SNUG, DRILLED AND VOILA. JUST NEEDS A BIT OF POLISH AND THAT'S ANOTHER JOB DONE.
 THIS IS THE TANK GRAFFICS THAT I TRYED OUT.
NOW THE SKULL IS STAYING BUT I DONT LIKE THE THING ON THE SIDE , SO ILL TRY SOMETHING ELSE.

SPORTSTER PT5

 I'VE ALWAYS BEEN A BIT PISSED OFF WITH THE CHOSE OF TYRES AVAILABLE FOR A 16" WHEEL, SO I HAVE BEEN AFTER A 17"RIM FOR MY HARLEY. I WAS AFTER A CBR 600 REAR WHEEL SO ASKED A FRIEND . "YEAH, I GOT ONE ILL DROP IT ROUND. YOU CAN HAVE IT FOR NUFIN"
WHAT HE DELIVERED WAS A FRONT WHEEL FOR A SUZUKI.....
I LOOKED AT IT AND THOUGHT " FUCK IT! IT MIGHT WORK." BUT I NEEDED TO MAKE SOME SPACERS FOR THE SPROCKET AND DISK.
I SPOKE TO AN ENGINEER AND HE SAID HE COULD MACHINE SOME BILLET SPACERS FOR ME BUT I SUGESTED THAT I DRILL THEM MY SELF TO SAVE A BIT OF CASH.
HE THEN CAME UP WITH A BRILLIANT SOLUTION FOR MARKING OUT THE HOLES. 
HE CUT A PIECE OF PERSPEX THE SAME SIZE AS THE SPACERS SO THAT I COULD SEE THE HOLES (UNDERNIETH) THAT I NEED TO MARK THEN TRANSFER ONTO THE BILLET.
SO.. ABOUVE YOU CAN SEE THE PERSPEX WITH THE HOLES IN.

ABOUVE YOU CAN SEE HOW MARKING THE POSITION OF THE HOLES IS NOW EASY.

THIS IS THE BILLET WITH TWO SET'S OF HOLES IN (ONE TO BOLT THE SPACER TO THE WHEEL, THE OTHER TO BOLT THE SPROCKET TO THE SPACER-THIES HOLES NEED THREADING YET TO ACCEPT THE BOLTS).
I HAVE OFTEN WONDERED WEATHER A FRONT WHEEL WILL DEAL WITH THE TORQUE NEEDED FOR A BACK WHEEL, BUT I RECON ILL FIND OUT SOON. I HOPE IT GOES OK.

IN CASE YOUR'E WONDERING .. IT WONT STAY 80'S PURPLE AND IT WILL MATCH THE 3 SPOKE FRONT WHEEL( AS IN THE WHEEL ON THE FRONT OF MY MOTORCYCLE THAT ACTUALLY IS MEANT TO BE THE FRONT WHEEL OF A MOTORCYCLE)


SPORTSTER PT4

ITS BEEN GREAT HAVING ALL THIS TIME OFF OVER CHRISTMAS, AS IV'E HAD CHANCE TO MAKE A REAL MESS OF MY SPORTSTER.
BACK TO WORK TOMORROW, SHIT!
 AN ENGINEER I KNOW KINDLY REAMED OUT THE 'EXUP 1000' BOTTOM YOLK SO THAT I COULD PRESS THE HARLEY SHAFT INTO PLACE. THE YOLKS (OR TREES) NOW FIT BUT I NEED TO MODIFY THE TOP YOLK SO THAT I CAN FIT THE HANDLEBAR RISERS.
 THE SWING-ARM ASSEMBLEY HAS BEEN A THORN IN MY SIDE EVER SINCE I'VE OWNED THIS BIKE. IT NEEDED TO BE COMPLEETLY REPLACED AFTER 15000 MILES AS IT WAS SHOT TO BITS. AND ITS STILL SHIT. IT'S A BLOODY CRAP DESIGN . SO I'M GUNNA DO IT PROPERLY (HOW IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN DONE IN THE FIRST PLACE).
ILL POST THE NEW PLAN WHEN I'VE GOT IT COMPLEETY FIGURED OUT.
ME CONTEMPLATING WHAT A BIG MESS I HAVE MADE.

"OH WELL, KANT BRAKE EGGS WITH-OUT MAKING AN OMLETTE."


SPORTSTER PT3

TODAY I FINALLY FINISHED THE SEAT-UNIT

 ITS TAKEN ME MENY DAYS OF FUCKIN AROUND TO GET THIS SEAT SORTED.
I COULD HAVE PAYED FOR SOMEONE ELSE WHO NEW 'THEIR SHIT' TO DO IT BUT I DECIDED TO TRY MYSELF.
AS YOU CAN SEE I BUILT UP THE SEAT USING LAYERS OF FOAM. CUTTING AND TAPING IN PLACE TO GET THE RIGHT SHAPE.
 THEN I CUT UP AN OLD PAIR OF LEATHER TROUSERS AND STITCHED THEM INTO SHAPE.
THIS IS ME HARD AT WORK WITH A VAT OF TURKEY SOUP ON THE GO (SINCE IT'S BEEN CHRISTMAS I RECON WE GOT TURKEY SOUP FOR WEEKS TO COME.)
 THIS IS CHECKIN THE PANNELS OF LEATER ARE GUNNA WORK.
 THEN I PAINTED THE SEAT-UNIT AND GLUED ALL THE LAYERS OF FOAM IN PLACE AND ATTACHED POPPERS FOR THE REAR OF THE SEAT COVER TO ATTACH.
IF YOU COVER A SEAT ALLWAYS WRAP THE FOAM IN CLING-FILM BEFORE FITTING  THE COVER AS THIS WILL STOP THE FOAM GETTING SOAKED AND GIVING YOU A PERMANIANTLY WET ASS.

 SEAT IS DONE AND FITTED.
IM NOT COMPLEETLY CHUFFED WITH IT AS IT'S A BIT BAGGY, BUT ILL USE IT FOR A BIT , SEE IF IT'S COMFORTABLE THEN GET IT COVERED BY A PRO.
HOPE FULLY THE GRAB RAIL AND STUFF WILL HIDE THE CRAP JOB.


SPORTSTER PT 2


 TODAY I FINNISHED WORK UNTILL THE NEW YEAR.
WAHOOO!
SO TODAY IVE BEEN IN THE SHED.
I HAD TO CUT THE FRAME AND BEND IT UP (GOT A LITTLE BIT SCARED AS ITS WAS STILL STANDARD, BUT NOT ANYMORE) THEN WELD IT BACK TOGETHER. I USED A TIG WITH STAINLESS FILLER ROD AS THE FRAME SECTION IS CAST.
THEN I WELDED IN SOME FLAT BAR TO SUPPORT THE SEAT UNIT. WELL MY TIG WELDING IS GETTING NEATER AND THE SEAT IS STARTING TO TAKE SHAPE.
THEN I PULLED THE REST OF THE FRONT END TO PIECES SO THAT I COULD SORT OUT THE NEW FORKS. BUT AS HARLEY HAVE WEIRD IMPERIAL TORX HEAD BOLTS I COULDN'T UNDOO THE FORKS SO THAT JOB WILL HAVE TO WAIT TILL TOMOROW.
SHED TIME PART 2

 TODAYS JOB WAS TO MAKE THE SEAT UNIT, BUT AS I GOT RIGHT PISSED LAST NT , I DIDNT FINNISH IT, AS IT FELT LIKE "THE HAIR WAS GROWING ON THE INSIDE OF MY HEAD."
BUT I MADE OK PROGRESS ALL THE SAME.
I STARTED BY WRAPPING THE FRAME RAILS WITH GAFFA TAPE THEN COUVERING EVERYTHING WITH CLINGFILM THEN I WENT TO WORK LAYING ON FIBERGLASS. THE HOLES IN THE WHITE SEAT UNIT ARE SO THE FIBERGLASS WILL KEY TO THE OTHE PART.
IT WAS BLOODY FREEZING IN THE SHED (I HAVENT GOT MY WOODBURNER SORTED YET) SO I HAD TO WARM THE GLASS WITH A HAIRDRIER TO GET IT TO CURE.
AS YOU CAN SEE ITS STARTING TO TAKE SHAPE BUT I RAN OUT OF RESIN SO I'LL FINNISH IT TOMORROW.
 THIS HARLEY WAS BRAND NEW IN MAY 2009. ITS THE  ONLY TIME I'VE CONSIDARED BUYING A NEW VEHICLE. SINCE THEN IVE DONE 26000 MILES AND RIDEN IT THROUGH THE SALT AND ICE OF WINTER. NOW IT LOOKS LIKE A RIGHT SHED.
THE BIKE IS SO MUCH FUN TO RIDE BUT GROUND CLEARANCE AND CRAP SUSPENTION LIMITS ITS HANDELING A LITTLE.
NOW IS THE TIME TO GET IT SORTED.
 HERE IS A SET OF FORKS FROM AN EXUP1000 AND REAR SHOCKS FROM A HARLEY XR1100 (THEY ARE 25MM LONGER AND MORE ADJUSTABLE.)
 FIRST THING TO GO WAS THE SHIT INDICATOR/BACK LIGHT THINGS. THEY LOOKED BLOODY COOL BUT THEY KEEP BREAKING (I HAVE GONE THROUGH 4 OF THEM) AND NOW THAT ITS OUT OF WARRANTY ILL BE FUCKED IF ILL SPEND £140 EACH FOR THEM.
I GOT A FLAT TRACKER SEAT UNIT FROM REDMAX SPEED SHOP AND IVE CUT IT, MOVED IT BACK AND NOW HAVE TO FIBERGLASS ANOTHER SECTION ON IT . THIS SHOULD GIVE   ME 'BIRD' A BIGGER COMFYER SEAT WITHOUT LOOKING SHIT.
AS YOU CAN SEE THE EXHORST  WAS GETTING IN THE WAY OF GOING AROUND CORNERS,  SO THAT HAS COME OFF AND NOW I HAVE TO HONE MY SKILLS SO THAT I CAN MAKE A NEW STAINLESS 2-1 JOBBY THAT LOOKS COOL.
KEEP TUNED FOR NEXT INSTALLMENT.......

2 comments:

Chris said...

What a shame we didn't see you with last years bike of the season winner. DO you still have it ?

OILY RAG said...

my Triumph didnt have all the bugs sorted last year then i had a winter from hell that included a house fire which ment that we had to move house untill ours was sorted. also i had to sort my Harley(as it was in need of sorting out and its my daily ride).
i am sorting out my Triumph very soon then ill be riding it more.
The BMAD doo was great.it gave me a chance had a great day out of the garage